yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
