sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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