have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
