Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
