Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
