Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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