I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
