i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize