I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
