I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
should my penis look like a turkey
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Randomize
