Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
my liver is dry heaving
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
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