I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
