Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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