Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
