You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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