Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
