was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
