Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
