I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I understand Curling. That high.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
