he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
