I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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