Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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