I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
