one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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