we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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