so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
