My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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