Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
