I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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