Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
