is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
