And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
