I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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