I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
