brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
