Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
