Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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