he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
