I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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