They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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