he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
