Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
