Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
