As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I got inside last night via doggy door
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize