ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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