when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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