Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
