Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize