I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We got so high we made milksteak
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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