Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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